An interesting discussion is that of our life’s journey and the one of our life’s loves! I have always had an interest in both topics and I have seldom discussed these as I like to live life and get on with it. As I’m learning to share Ive lost a lot, but also grown a lot and I sometime wonder if this is how it’s actually supposed to be on this path that I call life and is it preset the route that gets taken.
In life I believe we all have our own path to walk. No one can ever understand what you see, what you feel what you hear what you smell. Everyone, no matter how similar, has their own path to walk on and in the process I believe many people cross your path, walk next to you on their path, some wonder off and come back while others never do. Each and ever path has its own experiences, battles and triumphs. Some of these paths never even come near you, but still they are on a path that just perhaps is on a different level to yours and can at times even affect your path.
Life is interesting because of that. The sooner we realize that we are all on individual paths and that no two paths can ever be in the same place at the same time, we start realizing how unique our own lives really are. Perhaps it’s a way of not expecting too much from anyone or perhaps it’s a reason to expect more, but no matter how you look at it, yours is yours and theirs is theirs, and ne’r the twain shall meet!
Love on the other hand is something that you carry along with you on your path. Its like the mist that surrounds you and at times two mists create a cloud that is just too wonderful. Sometimes the two clouds create electricity and work while other clouds created make a loud thunder and crash in the process. Pretty soon the two clouds part and you are surrounded by your own mist once again.
Love has many facets. We love each and every person, or animal, in a different way. A mother loves both her children equally but in a very different way because each child is so different and the chemistry and dynamics of each child with their mother will always be different, but there is no measure on the mothers love, just because it’s different. Lovers fall in love and build a relationship based on that energy that is created at first. Sometimes the energy fizzles out, sometimes it’s a negative combination of energies and they soon part, but then there is the marvel of falling in love and creating a love that is just wonderful and strong, no matter what.
I believe falling in love is a phase. Loving someone is not. Real relationships go through good times, bad times happy times and sad. They are confidence builders, and sometime confidence destroyers, but the actual root is so strong that the continual growth over the years makes it worth nurturing to grow stronger and stronger. At times you are in love with each other but that does not last forever. The relationships root would not sustain the ‘in-love; strength all the time. It’s the love that builds the root and the moments of being ‘in love’ are like the nutrients that you feed it. The relationship base is that of love and the in love is the part that’s like a roller coaster; sometimes scary, sometimes exciting, sometimes fun, sometimes… but the roller-coaster ride goes in and out of your love ‘root’ as your journey together continues.
Im not willing to loose my loves, but I cant stop them from wanting to loose me. I believe in nurturing the root to the death and on my life’s path, that’s very important to me. I cannot choose who I love or who I fall in love with because I am not someone that goes out looking for love, yet it does not stop my loved ones from doing what is right in their life’s path. If the root is worth fighting for, and wanted, then all should be able to be worked through no matter what.
The life path is our solid footing and the air we breathe which is a necessity as we are on it alone. The loves on our path are like the bonuses we get as we walk along our path. IT makes our path more enjoyable mostly, but occasionally there are some hidden thorns hidden away.
I believe that the pain of the thorns is worth bearing, no matter what. My life is so much more fulfilled for having these bonuses and I cant help but wanting them to improve, but I also realize that not all bonuses believe what I do, and its sad.
I can never ever release those bonuses from my heart as I walk along my life’s path! Our life paths and our loves are all on a parallel road, called happiness.
Love is complicated because we make it that way. We decide how to react to other people and what feeling to share or not to share. People alone are complacated it's bound to be that two people together will be complicated even more.
ReplyDeleteLearn to understand your partner's dreams and desires; know what frustrates and discourages that person. Patiently deal with the shortcomings and before you know it, you're on your way to enjoying the relationship that you've been wanting. But don't give them everything to the point that you'll be trampled on. Learn the delicate balance of giving.
Talk, but also listen. It's very easy to commit the big mistake, so learn how not to. Men are generally not born conversationalists. Taking part in a conversation about relationships and serious emotions isn't their cup of tea. So it's up to you to know what works in keeping the lines of communication open.
The best solution to keep yourself interested in a long term relationship with "you" is to know what both your strengths are and knowing how to magnify those. Who wants to be always reminded of their failures, right?
Charles ..
Charles, My blessings are many. I have a realtionship of 20 years and 6 years and I think Love is all part of a growing process. ITs very important to not be reminded of your failures as we are the 1st ones who know they are there to haunt us. Our partners should be there to support us through thick and thin, as we should do to them. Unfortunatly as the relationships grow we do all tend to break that stance every now and then and we all get hurt, and later regret it. - but that is what makes the relationship last and grow.
ReplyDeleteThanks for all your insightful input. Its great to be able to read your views.
If you are coping with a relationship breakup, you may wonder if and when you will ever feel better. The cliché “time heals all wounds” does really apply to the loss of a relationship. Though the process may feel long and difficult, painful feelings of loss and longing resulting from a relationship breakup will diminish over time. However, anything that disrupts the letting go process, such as seeing one’s partner or having hope raised for reconciliation, may temporarily rekindle feelings. Moving on from a relationship breakup sometimes means accepting that there may be no satisfying answer to why the relationship had to end, or recognising that people often “grow out of” relationships. This may mean coming to terms with limits in being able to control what a romantic partner chooses to do. For some people, there may be a “final straw” which helps them to move on from the relationship.
ReplyDeleteIt is true that there is no way around feeling emotional pain after a relationship breakup. Your feelings reflect the importance of your ex-parnter and you ability to accept this and grieve the loss.
Charles,